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Les règles du Black Metal et d'autres conneries |
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Black Winter
Loud Le Parrain Joined: 10 Mai 2007 Location: Le Kef ,Tunisie Status: Offline Points: 459 |
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Posted: 26 Juillet 2007 at 18:04 |
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a lire, et à confirmer des grands black metaleux du forum ,avec esprit large
101 rules of black metal: 1. Don't be gay. 2. Be "true". 3. All people who aren't "true" are gay. 4. Be grim. 5. Be necro. 6. Be simultaneously grim and necro if at all possible. 7. Break things while being grim and necro. 8. Don't have fun at concerts. Stand around with arms crossed. 9. Repeat all above while denouncing organized religion in any form. 10. Never ever, EVER under ANY circumstances... 11. ...Listen to Peccatum. 12. When someone asks you if you enjoy the music of Mayhem, point out that you only enjoy the music of "the true" Mayhem. Maniac is gay. 13. Don't play with fuzzy things, excepting that by "play" you mean "burn". 14. Don't be Dani Filth. 15. Never, ever, under any circumstances utter the phrase "Kenny G slams, man." 16. Don't be Dani Filth. 17. When your mom tells you to take out the garbage tell her that you're too metal to remove refuse. 18. Run for it! 19. Sodomize a virgin ****. 20. Sodomize anything that is not male. (Fuzzy things look out!) 21. Make sure your album goes out of print about 3 years after its release... so it becomes 'cult'. 22. When in doubt, say "True Norwiegian Black Metal!" 23. If that doesn't work, blast beats can fill any silence. 24. Turn any cross you find upside-down. 25. Nipple twisting is not a blackmetal activity.. 26. Write a cult, underground, grim and necro zine. Feature only interviews with bands no one has heard of, even "true" blackmetallers. 27. Never ever, EVER, EVER be open-minded. 28. Never write songs less than 15 minutes long and containing less than 15 adjectives in the title. 29. a) paint face. b) go in woods. c) act like troll. 30. Don't be Mortiis (or Dani Filth). 31. Don't wear white shoes after Labor Day. 32. Don't make jokes only your mom would get. 33. Don't make jokes. 34. When in doubt, scowl with eyes downturned. 35. Don't eat Marshmellow Peeps. 36. To producers of black metal albums: remember...no low end! If it doesn't hurt to listen to, it can't be "true". 37. Make sure that no less than half of the musicians on your album are "session" members. 38. When in concert, always growl names of songs so that they are imperceptible. This will ensure that anyone who doesn't have your "cult" LP won't get it. 39. Never play live. 40. When getting ready to go to a show, completely forget that the other people there are not going to the show to look at you. 41. Use barbed wire whenever possible. (Note: this assists in being both "necro" and "grim".) 42. When asked by a non true BMer what BM is, say something like, "BM is the raw essence of pure black evil in man", in any case, make sure that by the conversations end, the other person still has no idea what black metal is. 43. Drive one of your band members to suicide, and claim he died because of the "mainstream" "infecting" the "scene". 44. Reform with "old members" and release an album intended to produce commercial success. 45. When it flops say that you meant it to fail cause anything less wouldn't be "true". 46. Have a side project. Ensure that all other members of your band also have side projects. 47. Fill out the other slots in your other member's side projects as "session" musicians. 48. Record everything in the same studio with the same producer/instruments/equipment/etc. 49. Make sure your album cover never consists of more than three colors (color options allowed: grey, black, white). 50. Publicly state that your band is "non-religious", then use the word "s****n" over 400 times on your one-song t< src=om |
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gally
Medium Joined: 25 Fevrier 2005 Location: Tunisia Status: Offline Points: 204 |
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waw! stick to only one true rule;juste be yourself dude |
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If you work for the living, why do you kill yourself working???
-Another s*** in the system- |
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Black Winter
Loud Le Parrain Joined: 10 Mai 2007 Location: Le Kef ,Tunisie Status: Offline Points: 459 |
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102.
103. Love Norway more than your own country
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crithtgoth
Band Member Seventh Doom - Guitariste Joined: 05 Décembre 2006 Location: Russian Federat Status: Offline Points: 433 |
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ca te dit pas de faire une traduction mdr
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Black Winter
Loud Le Parrain Joined: 10 Mai 2007 Location: Le Kef ,Tunisie Status: Offline Points: 459 |
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désolé pour le contenu anglais,une nouvelle truc, comparaison entre le Black metal et le Rap:
Are rap and black metal alike? Rap: Obsessed with "keeping it real", an arbitrary set of rules Black metal: Obsessed with "staying true", an arbitrary set of rules Rap: Band members with fake names Black metal: Band members with fake names Rap: Complaints about oppression from white Christians Black metal: Complaints about oppression from white Christians Rap: Overly concerned with making money Black metal: Overly concerned with not making money Rap: Cheesy synthesizers Black metal: Cheesy synthesizers Rap: Barely in English Black metal: Barely in English Rap: Strong feelings about God Black metal: Strong feelings about God Rap: Black skin Black metal: Black leather Rap: 100 guest appearances on every album Black metal: 100 side projects by every band member Rap: Musicians arrested for murder Black metal: Musicians arrested for murder Rap: Closed-minded fanbase Black metal: Closed-minded fanbase Rap: Very expensive tennis shoes Black metal: Very expensive leather boots Rap: Imagery containing dogs Black metal: Imagery containing wolves Rap: Negative portrayals of whites Black metal: Negative portrayals of Jews Rap: Rips off samples from pop music Black metal: Rips off ideas from classical music Rap: Videos with super-shiny floors and cars Black metal: Videos with super-shiny swords Rap: Imagery of the urban jungles Black metal: Imagery of the bleak forests Rap: Pride in geographic region Black metal: Pride in geographic region Rap: Pride in own race Black metal: Pride in own race Rap: Songs about hanging out Black metal: Songs about hanging people Rap: Overly concerned with appearance Black metal: Overly concerned with appearance Rap: High number of guys with either no hair or long hair Black metal: High number of guys with either no hair or long hair Rap: Vocal style masks lack of singing ability Black metal: Vocal style masks lack of singing ability Rap: Take pride in their (unintentionally) humorous lyrics Black metal: Take pride in their (unintentionally) humorous lyrics Rap: Musicians face accusations of selling out Black metal: Musicians face accusations of selling out Rap: Unusual interest in ancestry Black metal: Unusual interest in ancestry Rap: Videos with scantily-clad women Black metal: Promo photos with scantily-clad women Rap: Booty Calls are a common theme Black metal: A Call To Arms is a common theme Rap: Constantly drinking alcohol Black metal: Constantly drinking alcohol Rap: Axing people kweshuns Black metal: Carrying battle axes Edited by Black Winter - 27 Juillet 2007 at 15:30 |
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dethronedspirit
Medium Joined: 27 Décembre 2006 Location: Elba Status: Offline Points: 182 |
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t'as fait du bon travail black winter
la différence est la !! ca résume tout
l'intervalle entre le rap et le BLACK METAL est immesurable il tend vers l'infinie , c'est incomparable ,
en tout cas c'est une bonne idée ^^ Edited by dethronedspirit - 27 Juillet 2007 at 16:08 |
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Angra Mainyu
Band Member Lord Ahriman - basse Joined: 20 Décembre 2006 Location: Tamazgha Status: Offline Points: 47 |
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je pense que c'est un topic banal.
les 101 regles de Black Metalou ta trouvé ca ????? C'est un topic pour les nouveaux née du Black Metal,je pense que tu as copier ces information d'un site et tu la mi ici.
en plus au lieu d'aimer le norvege,on peux essayer de faire du bon black metal en tunisie (Juste pour les pro fan de Black Metal) |
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Black Winter
Loud Le Parrain Joined: 10 Mai 2007 Location: Le Kef ,Tunisie Status: Offline Points: 459 |
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c'est ça le type des black metalleux qui sont "anciennement nées". Tu le prend serieusement ou quoi?il y a un sujet intutlé "Le Black metal" si tu veux te defendre |
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crithtgoth
Band Member Seventh Doom - Guitariste Joined: 05 Décembre 2006 Location: Russian Federat Status: Offline Points: 433 |
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c un topic tfarhid alors pas la peine de nous montrer que tes un exelent membre et que tu c tt et tt sinon wé il a copier c info dun autre cite et ca pr que nous en rit (ou plutot nitfarahdou ) si ta besoin de fair linteressant messieux le sérieux va sur sujet délicat ou un truc comme ca |
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Black Winter
Loud Le Parrain Joined: 10 Mai 2007 Location: Le Kef ,Tunisie Status: Offline Points: 459 |
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bon ensuite, et juste bech netfarhed 3la 7seb si Ahriman, qulques fotos redicules de groupes de black metal
Rob Darken (Graveland) allons-foret-mask-boots-sabre--photo Immortal (Championnat des Sumo-Karate-Black-redicule) Maniac (Mayhem) version Black fatigué de Marilyn Manson Edited by Black Winter - 27 Juillet 2007 at 19:05 |
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human
Treble Joined: 28 Avril 2007 Location: blakc hole sun Status: Offline Points: 113 |
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Black Metal = Freak Show from norway |
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your shameful heaven is full of devils, just like me ,just , for you
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shadow_of_doom
Loud Joined: 09 Fevrier 2007 Location: Opeth's Land Status: Offline Points: 555 |
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tu as pleinenemt le droit de t'épanouir et de jouir de ton temps perdu, mais tache de moin toucher au fin fond du black sinon sa deviendra moqueur et là t'orra à assumer ta responsabilité!
Je ne suis pas contre l'idée du topic mais plutôt contre l'idée de comparer le:
St Black au rap!
et en les présentant avec tant de simulitude!
Bref fait ce que tu veux puisque de toute façon ces du tfarhid!
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Give Opeth Another Listen!
Changez vers Linux, ça vaut le coup ! ! ! |
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human
Treble Joined: 28 Avril 2007 Location: blakc hole sun Status: Offline Points: 113 |
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black metal fans are always srious,
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your shameful heaven is full of devils, just like me ,just , for you
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Black Winter
Loud Le Parrain Joined: 10 Mai 2007 Location: Le Kef ,Tunisie Status: Offline Points: 459 |
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je vais ajouter le prefixe "St" tout de suite t'en marre plus
they are dead serious human Edited by Black Winter - 02 Août 2007 at 19:35 |
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Black Winter
Loud Le Parrain Joined: 10 Mai 2007 Location: Le Kef ,Tunisie Status: Offline Points: 459 |
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Triste Sire
Treble Joined: 28 Juin 2007 Location: Tunisia Status: Offline Points: 105 |
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Vraiment je trouve ca trés désolant le fait de comparer le "rap" et le black ...
Meme si le topic est sous le nom de "tfarhid", ca ne me fait pas rire du tout ...(je trouve que ca a dépassé les limites de la rigolade !)
Enfin bon, peut etre que j'exagere un petit peu mais bon ....
(je suis contre ce sujet seulement sur ce point)
Sinon la photo d'Immortal ne s'affiche pas ...
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Mon ame est un tombeau, que mauvais cénobite,
Depuis l'éternité je parcours et j'habite; Rien n'embellit les murs de ce cloitre odieux. |
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Black Winter
Loud Le Parrain Joined: 10 Mai 2007 Location: Le Kef ,Tunisie Status: Offline Points: 459 |
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l'image s'affiche maintenant
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Triste Sire
Treble Joined: 28 Juin 2007 Location: Tunisia Status: Offline Points: 105 |
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Oui, elle s'affiche maintenant mais aprés l'avoir vu j'aurais préféré qu'elle ne s'affiche pas ...
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Mon ame est un tombeau, que mauvais cénobite,
Depuis l'éternité je parcours et j'habite; Rien n'embellit les murs de ce cloitre odieux. |
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dethronedspirit
Medium Joined: 27 Décembre 2006 Location: Elba Status: Offline Points: 182 |
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je crois qu on a dépassé la limite du rigolade et sois disant "tfarhid", car avec votre image cher black winter vous avez plus au moins massacré une légende meme en rigolant
au début l'idée du topic etait sympas mais maintenant ca devient alors on doit komem savoir moderer nos régolades , j'attend une explication , merci Edited by dethronedspirit - 18 Août 2007 at 21:33 |
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Dzekrifus
Band Member White Creek - guitariste chanteur Joined: 04 Août 2006 Location: Neutral Zone Status: Offline Points: 561 |
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104. Seem choked when you read jokes about BM
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